Friday 25th April

I’m a Virgin at Socials & Business but an Expert at Vagina’s!

So that has been my introduction at networking events, my social handle and generally a fair reflection of where I am at. Starting Birth From Within (BFW) has been very much like a planned pregnancy. The vision, the dreams, the hopes, the highs, the lows, the failed attempts, the losses, confusion, fear, aspirations, expectations, anticipation and so many more feelings, thoughts and unknowns. The dream and vision I have for BFW was the same as why I became a midwife…to help give birth back to women. A strong community of women, coming together, sharing empowering, uniting and believing in the rite of passage of birth. What I have experienced has been very reflective of pregnancy planning in our modern world.

Having been an independent midwife before, I had a company called Life from Within, the essence and principles were much the same as BFW, but it seemed a lot less complex back then (pregnancy seemed so much less complex then too!). I had the Vision, set up the Vision, implemented the Vision, the Vision was successful. I then became pregnant with my daughter Honey and doubted my abilities to continue with becoming a mum again and running a my own business. I wanted security and thought the NHS would provide this, and it did in many ways. However, working in the NHS distracted me away from being my authentic self. The last 18 years has been an interesting journey full of amazing experiences as well as challenging ones. During this return to the NHS I watch the erosion of midwives’s autonomy, the escalation of fear and the decline in women’s abilities to be heard, speak their choices and birth their babies, the way they choose. This escalation of fear driven care has been so rapid in the last 7 years, it left me feeling broken and deluded. But the spark for me to continue on this journey of supporting women to have the birth they want, has never dimmed!

So I find myself, after many false positives, miscarriages (of justice), artificial fertility attempts, and many other pregnancy related analogies, I’m finally on what seems to be a positive pregnancy journey of BFW. And whilst I know a lot about vagina’s I know hardly anything about business or using social media. Just like a pregnancy, everyone has a view on socials and business, give opinions, share knowledge, what the research says, suggestions and well meaning advice and just like pregnancy, I know I need to connect with ‘my baby’, find my answers within and trust the process. The information given to me, the knowledge I gather is amazing but the inner knowing is essential. It is my guide. I follow my instincts, feed myself and the business healthy things, things I know will build strong foundations, hydrated, rest, play, network but mostly believe all will be well. I draw my Positive Pregnancy Affirmation cards daily and see how they relate to the growth of BFW. I am so proud of these cards and so delighted that I am using them on my pregnancy journey of BFW.

We women are incredible beings, who can create a life from two cells, naked to the human eye. We can nurture, grow and birth another human from within our own bodies and then birth them. With the right support, love and understanding from our men, partners and network our babies can grow and flourish to be a future full of love. And that my friends is what I dream BFW will support you all with. Empower you to look within for your guide, to believe in yourself and be full of love.

In love and light

Sunday 9th March 2025

The Latest Up-date:

It is Sunday afternoon and having completed so much over the last few months, everything caught up with me and I fell ill to the dreaded lurgy. WOW that knocked me for six, but I’m back on my feet again and ready to get going again. I am continuing to run the ‘Mum’s Space’ meets, but for now they will be in the comfort of my home. As brilliant and beautiful as Lupton was, it is too far for many mums to travel and at times a tad cold. Whilst I search for another space I thought I’d invite you lovely ladies into my home, its no palace but it is welcoming and full of love. My classes are now available on-line so that I can reach a wider audience and the Rainbow groups are going to be my next thing to promote and get off the ground. I have been networking and meeting some amazing women who have such wonderful services to offer…so watch this space and more links will appear. I am in the middle of writing an e-book and as most of you know I am writing an actual book, so if you want your birth story included, please do send me them. I love reading and listening to your birth stories.

There are two really exciting things that I do need to share. The first is, and this might seem quite controversial, bewildering and even shocking to some of you…I am going to relinquish my midwifery PIN. It has been on my mind for some time now and without going into too many details at the moment, it has become a shackle and a silencer rather than something to enable me to be with woman. I used to be proud to say I was a registered midwife, now I’ve become ashamed to say I am a registered midwife. I will always be a midwife, nobody can take that away from me…EVER, I just will not be a registered midwife. In fact, I shall now be an un-registered midwife and a keeper of birth. I won’t go into the politics behind my decision but lets just say the weight that has been lifted off my heart and shoulders is immense.

The second exciting thing to let you all know is that I am going to be starting a pod cast! Now I know this is quite a trendy thing at the moment but I am hoping you beautiful, wonderful women and partners to be my guests, to tell me your stories, pass on your knowledge and get the community talking about what is important for them and share your lived experiences. It is going to be called The Good, The Bad and The Vagina! Perfect I thought, for what my vision is for it, good stories, bad stories and obviously as its about birth it had to be called the vagina. I’ll keep you up-dated on the launch date.

I am hoping now the shackles of the NMC are off me I will be able to truly step into my power again, because the last few years have been very constraining. I don’t know how anyone can be a midwife with a straight-jacket and a mussel on, but I wish each and everyone of them the very best. I have, in the most part had a wonderful career as a registered midwife but I am now excited for this new chapter of my life to begin. I will no longer be a busy and stressed fool but a happy, relaxed and more authentic me, doing what I love doing the most, empowering women to step into their own power, feel it, own it and roar at the top of their voice ‘I AM AMAZING AND I CAN DO WHATEVER THE FUCK I WANT’.

And finally, I just so you know I am practicing what I say to you all; I am amazing, I love what I do, and I believe in myself. It has taken some blood, sweat, tears, self reflection, lots of support from lots of beautiful loving people who also love and believe in me, but this me…and I am lovely! I thank everyone of you beautiful people who have supported me, held me, wiped my tears, listened to me and loved me for who I am. From the bottom of my heart I thank you with all the love in my heart and soul.

FRIDAY 24TH JANUARY 2025:

Two Years Later: A New Chapter Begins

Almost two years have passed since I last wrote on my blog, and my goodness, so much has happened. After much reflection and soul-searching, I have made the difficult decision to leave the NHS. While I initially hoped to balance Birth From Within (BFW) alongside my NHS role, the trust that employed me was unable to accommodate this. There were challenges, some of them difficult, which led to a slower-than-anticipated start for BFW. But here we are now, and the journey has taught me so much about myself, life, business, and—most importantly—what women truly deserve.

I have always been a fierce advocate for women and their families. But now, more than ever, I believe women need a voice. For those who know me, becoming a midwife over 30 years ago wasn’t just a career choice—it was a calling. I entered this field because I saw that women’s voices in childbirth were being ignored, and I wanted to help give birth back to women.

I’ll never forget the midwife who inspired me, Julia Bennett. She believed in me, supported my choices, and allowed me to birth my baby at home—where I felt safest—despite the so-called “risk factors.” She saw me, she heard me, and her unwavering support changed my life. Julia became the reason I pursued midwifery, and from that moment, I never looked back.

I’ve worked in homes, hospitals, the community—even once in a field—and I’ve always found joy in being with women (the true meaning of “midwife”). Whether it was on the wards, as a labour ward coordinator, or as a team leader, my purpose remained the same: to support women. But over time, I became deeply saddened by what I witnessed—the steady erosion of women’s voices in childbirth.

The more I advocated for women, the more challenges I faced. The toll on my wellbeing was enormous. Navigating a system rooted in fear often felt impossible. Fear undermines a woman’s connection to her instincts, her body, and her authentic self. How can we make empowered decisions when fear clouds everything?

But it doesn’t have to be this way.

Pregnancy can be an incredible journey when you trust your body, care for it, and prepare for both birth and parenting. Birth can be beautiful when you believe in your innate strength, courage, and abilities. Parenting can be joyful when you’re present, connected, and open to seeing the world through your baby’s eyes.

This is the heart of what Birth From Within stands for: supporting, guiding, and empowering you to trust yourself, look within for answers, and use knowledge as a tool—not a rule. As human beings, we gather information every day to help us make decisions. But ultimately, our instincts and feelings guide us, and that’s where true wisdom lies.

Over the past 30 years, I have witnessed the art of “being” and “with woman”, stripped from childbirth, replaced by a system driven by fear. Women are often coerced into care options that don’t align with their instincts, all because of the small chance something could go wrong. Yes, interventions have a place, but their excessive use has created a culture of mistrust—mistrust in our bodies and our capabilities.

We need to change this. We need to reclaim faith in our ability to grow, birth, and raise our babies with love. By nourishing and caring for our incredible bodies during pregnancy, we set ourselves up for a positive birth experience. And through the transformative rite of childbirth, we prepare ourselves to embrace parenting with confidence, presence, and love.

Our mission at Birth From Within is simple yet profound: to coach, support, and empower you to embark on this extraordinary journey. A journey that will transform not only your life but also help you become the best version of yourself—the best parent for your baby.

This is more than just a mission. It’s a movement. A call to reconnect with ourselves, to find balance in a fast-paced, high-tech world, and to embrace the beauty and power of birth and parenting.

Here’s to trusting yourself, your instincts, and your amazing ability to create life.

27th January 2023:

Hi everyone, today I received a phone call from a distressed woman who is currently 28 weeks pregnant. She is exploring her options and choices about where to have her baby and is really considering the option of a home birth. What she was concerned about was the ambulance strike and how would that impact on her decision making. Firstly, I reassured her that having still quite a few weeks until she is due to give birth then she does not have to make any decisions as to where she gives birth just yet. In fact, the decision as to where to give birth does not need to happen until you are in labour! There is always a lot of talk about planning child birth but it is a force of nature, and like the weather we are unable to control or predict it. What we can do is consider all possibilities. Lets consider this scenario: your pregnancy is full term, you feel well, you know your baby is well and you are feeling ok about the pending birth, knowing that you have an open mind about the event but really would like a homebirth. Discussion with the midwife has been generally positive but ‘risks’ were discussed (I may add here that it is rarely discussed with women the ‘risks’ going into hospital). One of the issues raised was the availability of a midwife and the delay in ambulance time if required. Something to consider but really only on the day will you know if any of these variables are an issue. So don’t let that ‘formality’ of information from the midwife sway your decision. You really can not decide if you are 100% going to have a home birth until you establish your labour. You may go into labour and ‘feel’ that things do not feel right for you, if that’s the case trust your instinct and go to hospital. Remember, you are leaving all your options and choices available to you based on the events that are happening. You may contact the hospital and say you are wanting a home birth and could a midwife come and assess you. They may have a midwife (and I have to say the midwives will always try to accommodate this) but they may not. Evaluate at the time if you feel comfortable and happy to wait for availability for an assessment or do you need to be seen now. If you believe your labour is advancing and you can’t move, then say so. It is safer to stay where you are, call an ambulance and demand a midwife then to travel in your car and give birth on the way. Only you will know what is right for you. If you believe that it is safe for you to go to hospital then make your way there. If you arrive at the hospital and wish to stay there as you feel safer, then do so. remember, there is no right or wrong way to birth, you are not failing yourself because you didn’t get a home birth. You are in fact making the right choice and decision at the time based on the events presented to you and what feel right. If you want to explore more about this subject and any other subjects related to pregnancy, birth and parenting then book onto one of our bespoke classes, workshops or book a private consultation with a midwife to discuss your individual situation circumstances. We look forward to meeting you

20th January 2023:

Hi, my name is Tess and I am very excited about the launch of Birth From Within. I have over 25 years’ experience in midwifery, parenting and supporting families through this amazing journey. I am a mother of 5 children and each one of those births was unique as they are as human beings. I am passionate about pregnancy, birth and parenting and love to empower women and partners through their own unique journey. My enthusiasm for a holistic approach to care provision has led me to taking a leap of faith and offer these bespoke classes, workshops and consultations so that you can optimise your well-being and knowledge for your own unique journey. Each week there will be a ‘BLOG’ covering a subject or topic of interest, it would be lovely to receive your views and comments too. The classes, workshops and consultations are designed to be informative, empowering and educational. In the beautiful surroundings of Lupton house (and any other venue I source for these classes I will ensure that the environment is suitable for everyone’s comfort), the classes will be relaxing, comfortable and a safe space where you can explore your pregnancy. birth options and becoming a parent. As we are all unique beings, these classes will be bespoke for you. If you want to find out more then you can book a free 30minute call with me to explore if we offer what you need. If you excited and happy with what you have seen or heard the please book on a course to suit your needs. I am pleased to welcome you to this new and exciting adventure and I am honoured that you have chosen to share your journey with us.